Survivor: San Juan Del Sue, Episode 8

Merge episode part 2 finally delivered the edge of your seat tribal council that we deserve. Despite the pre-tribal council editing, and barring anything exceptionally crazy, Wes, Alec and Reed will be the next eliminated in predictable tribal councils. The only thing I hated about this week is that Jeremy is now back in the position of power, and will likely make it to the end with Natalie, and a seat filler, likely Missy, and take home the million dollar prize. I really hope that I am wrong, but it is not looking like we are going to see Jeremy's torch snuffed anytime soon. With that being said, it will come as no surprise that number 11 this week goes to........

11. Jeremy

Jeremy, after winning individual immunity. Does this guy ever stop smiling????


As much as I rag on Jeremy for being a miserable prick, I have to admit that he did earn a few points last night. He showed some compassion for the ladies when the men were being, you know, men. I think he even may have had an actual, legitimate smile at his reward taco feast. But, he was probably just smiling because Wes was in pain, and vomiting. I am pretty sure his facial twitching as he was on the verge of winning immunity, was another attempt at a smile, but at this point when Jeremy does not have a puss on his face, it is just odd, and I can't help but be reminded of this....

Unfortunately, it looks as though Grinch Jeremy will be grimacing his way to the final tribal council. 

10. Alec

If anything says "I wasn't expecting that", it's this face from Alec.

I have finally come to accept the fact that there is absolutely nothing likable about Alec. His pre-tribal council remark, "I feel as comfortable as I possibly could right now", referring to how confident he was that Jon and Jaclyn would vote with his alliance, was Survivor foreshadowing at its best. If he doesn't show us some redeeming qualities soon, even his father (you remember the guy that likes Alec wayyyyy more than his other son, Drew), is going to start thinking his son sucks. Drew sucked, but at least he was a struggling European male model.

9. Wes

How Wes and I look after a visit to a Mexican restaurant. 

I had both sympathy and empathy this week for Wesley. This may sound like I am being stereotypical, which I suppose I am, but I don't think Wes was trying to be disrespectful to the ladies around camp, unlike Alec. I am sure he was just being Louisiana, son-of-Keith, Wes.  

I empathized with Wes because every single time I go to a Mexican restaurant I get sick. Granted he got sick because he ate many, many, double tacos and had a few drinks, and I get sick because I eat a few bites of my taco and have many, many margaritas, but those are just details. 

8. Reed

Maybe if I stand like this long enough they will think I am a flamingo. They can't vote me out if they think I'm a flamingo, right?

Reed used the word "homeostasis" this week. That one word contains almost as many syllables as Reed has spoken in eight full episodes. I would love to get Jeff Probst's take on Reed. It seems the only time Reed speaks is when he is requesting something from Probst (asking for flint, asking to return the flint, asking for rice, asking for a rebuttal at tribal council, etc.) Is this guy needy or what? 

It FINALLY looks as though Reed is going to do something big next week in order to revenge his boyfriend's departure...and when he does, I think most of America will be in a state of homeostasis wondering who the hell that is on their screens. 

7. Missy

Has someone finally found husband number 4???????????

If you are wondering what Missy and Alec are doing in the picture above, the answer is moaning. But they are not moaning at the sight of the meat Probst has to offer them, as castaways typically do. This time they are moaning at the thought of enjoying ice cold margaritas on the reward trip. Missy's fantasy was short lived however, as she was not picked to be part of either team, and thus not invited to participate in the reward challenge, and forced to sit alone on a bench while the rest of her tribe battled it out. 

"Well, this F#&*^%#G sucks." - Ryan, imagining what Missy is thinking. 

After Keith told Missy that they were all voting for her daughter (!), Missy made sure that the king and queen of the beach were on their side, and more than likely offered Jon whatever he wanted to ensure her daughter's safety. In the meantime, however, Missy ensured the viewers that "Baylor knows I love her, and that is all that matters." I am fairly confident that is not "all that matters" to Baylor, and she would certainly beg to differ from her mother. 

6. Baylor

"And what are you going to do about this, mother?" (what Baylor's face says, when Missy informs her that she is being targeted by just about everyone.)

I am not sure what I have done wrong in my life to have Baylor in the office pool, but I apologize for it. It wouldn't be an episode of Survivor: San Juan Del Sur if Baylor didn't almost get voted off. After 8 episodes, Baylor has a whopping fourteen votes against her. And I am sure that if there was a tribal council last week, she would have had a few more tacked on. I do not dislike her personally, but it is difficult for her to be a favorite of mine because she seems so disliked by so many castaways. There has got to be something painstakingly terrible about her that I am missing.

Anyway, I predicted her to win eight weeks ago, and every week since, and now that she is in the majority alliance on the merged tribe, that doesn't look like it will be changing anytime soon. 

5. Josh

How Josh looks when he is being voted off of Survivor 

(Also, how I look when Baylor is almost voted off each week.)

While I am sad to see Josh go, I think it was his time, as his story line has been played out for a few weeks now, as his power has been diminishing rapidly. He was the king of Capoya for four weeks, then battled (with Jeremy) for the throne at Hunahpu for two weeks. Finally, when the merge happened, he lost all his power, as the only power in the game belonged to Jon (and Jaclyn if you want to get technical).

I'm sure Josh will have a very well prepared speech at the final tribal council, as he is now the first member of the jury. And hopefully, his vote for Baylor will be the vote that beats Jeremy, crowning her the winner of San Juan Del Sur.

(That is if Jon is already eliminated, of course.)

4. Natalie

Natalie, listening intently, as Missy tells her daughter that everyone hates her.

Since the John Rocker fiasco, Natalie has been on her best behavior. Natalie will make the final five, that is all but determined. However, her lack of screen time has been a major concern the past four weeks. Has Natalie realized that she should start being on her best behavior, or should she be concerned that the producers are saving all of her crazy outbursts for the blooper reel at the finale?  Hopefully, Natalie will continue to fly under the radar and convince her tribemates that she is not just 50% of the most intimidating Sri-Lankan twinnies of all time.  

3. Jaclyn

Jaclyn, moments away from starving to death.

Why is Jaclyn not at number two, you ask? The answer is simple; it is because she said "whatever I want, Jon will do". While she is probably right, I don't like it when anybody claims that their partner will do whatever they say. Now that the merge has sprouted, Jaclyn will likely be a key factor in the next few weeks, and hopefully take a bullet for Jon, should he not win immunity when it is his time to leave depart.

2. Keith

"How much...the hell longer...do we have to deal with this crap?" - Ryan imagining what Keith must be saying to himself.

My top four favorite things about Keith this week:

4. Keith spitting at the tribal council (after the girls clearly shared their frustration about the boys disturbing bodily functions).

3. "We are not at the Hilton, I haven't heard Wesley fart in a while."

2. Missy: "Who are we voting for, Keith?"

Keith: "Baylor, your daughter. Thats ok, right?"

1. "Wes is a good kid, he ain't been in jail yet."

(!!!!!!!!)

1. Jon

Jon's relief at finding the hidden immunity idol.

Me, when Jon found the idol. 

Not only did my boy find the hidden immunity idol this week, he also delivered the quote of the week:

"Think of me while you're tasting it!" he yelled back to the winning tribe. 

Bottom line, I love this guy and can't wait for him to take his $1,000,000, and what I am imagining, way more importantly, the title of Sole Survivor,  home to his Pops. 

PICK TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 8: BAYLOR
PICK TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 7: BAYLOR

PICK TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 6: BAYLOR
PICK TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 5: BAYLOR
PICK TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 4: BAYLOR

PICK TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 3: BAYLOR

PICK TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 2: BAYLOR

PICK TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 1: BAYLOR

WANT TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 8: JON
WANT TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 7: JON
WANT TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 6: JON

WANT TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 5: JON

WANT TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 4: JON

WANT TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 3: JON

WANT TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 2: JON

WANT TO WIN AFTER EPISODE 1: JON

THINK WILL BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 9: WES
THINK WILL BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 8: REED
THINK WILL BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 7: REED

THINK WILL BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 6: DALE

THINK WILL BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 5: WES

THINK WILL BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 4: DREW

THINK WILL BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 3: JACLYN

THINK WILL BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 2: JACLYN

WANT TO BE VOTED OFF EPISPDE 9: JEREMY
WANT TO BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 8: JEREMY
WANT TO BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 7: JEREMY

WANT TO BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 6: JEREMY

WANT TO BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 5: JEREMY

WANT TO BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 4: JEREMY

WANT TO BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 3: ROCKER

WANT TO BE VOTED OFF EPISODE 2: ROCKER